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Damnit With The Aardvark

A Man Threatens to “Kill Someone with Kindness” . . . Then Stabs Him with a Knife That Says “Kindness” on It – PNJ I’m not sure about this guy’s…

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When Furry Hands Touch Ya

See This List of America’s Favorite Condiments by State: Sriracha, Ranch and More – USMagazine Wait- the McDonald’s French Fry Box Has a Secret Spot for Ketchup – Delish Krispy…

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Shock Roulette

A Woman Has Been Banned from Walmart for Riding a Motorized Shopping Cart While Drinking Wine Out of a Pringles Can – TimeRecordsNews This classy, sexy lady may not be…

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He Shined The Old Statue

A Man Is Arrested After an Argument Over the Type of Bread a Cafe Used for His Cheesesteak – TheSmokingGun I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I kinda see…

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Chewing On That Nurse’s Butt

Even when Canadians are busted breaking the law, they’re somehow STILL charming. Cops in Manitoba pulled over a guy for going 90 miles-per-hour, and when they asked for an explanation,…

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I Don’t Like Serious Scott

Sounds About Right: Florida Man Attacks Father With Pizza After Finding Out His Dad Helped Deliver Him At Birth – Geekologie Because Florida Man’s mind works differently than most people’s,…

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Charlie Bucket Cleans My Teeth

Hooshe Extra Florida man denies syringes found in rectum are his – Local10 A Florida man claimed ignorance when jail officials found syringes in his rectum during an early morning…

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I Don’t Wanna Hear About Your Wheelhouse

Woman denied Outback Steakhouse attacks parents, threatens to ‘kill’ them – FoxNews One Florida woman apparently really wanted a Bloomin’ Onion. Deanne Seltzer was arrested last week after she allegedly…

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Bad Parkers Stay Bad Parkers

Scottish Driver Says He Can Use Cell Phone Safely, Then Crashes – TheSun Fake pastor carrying drug-filled Bible visited jail – KWTX Bridgeport man injured in explosion while inflating air…

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New Year, New Sheet

Naked, Drunk Man Tears Down Neighbor’s Holiday Decorations – Patch Investigators say a 61-year-old Wisconsin man was arrested for tearing down a neighbor’s Christmas decorations while drunk and naked. The…

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