HEADLINE HOOSHE: STORY OF THE WEEK
MONDAY'S HEADLINE HOOSHE
25-year-old Alicia Marie Popper of Bradenton, Florida was sitting by the pool at her trailer park on Sunday afternoon, doing the following things . . .
1. Neglecting her kids and not paying attention while they swam.
2. Eating a bowl of Ramen noodles.
3. Picking LICE out of her head.
Another woman at the pool reminded her they had rules against leaving your kids unattended, AND eating by the pool. They didn't have any rule about flicking lice out of your head, but that probably should've gone without saying. And Alicia responded by THROWING her plastic bowl of Ramen noodles at the woman . . . including her plastic fork. It hit her in the neck, but obviously she wasn't hurt. Alicia was still arrested and charged with battery.
TUESDAY'S HEADLINE HOOSHE
A Florida man was hit with a charge of driving under the influence after he allegedly was driving a tractor around Vero Beach and "dancing" in the seat. At some point during the tractor trip, Elias Velez-Morales also allegedly urinated on himself and on his clothes. In a possible effort to dry out, he had his genitals exposed. When an Indian River County Sheriff's investigator approached the 24-year-old, the officer noted that Velez-Morales "appeared to be so intoxicated he was unable to give (his) name and address." Velez-Morales did cop to having three beers. In addition to DUI, Velez-Morales was also charged with driving without a license.
WEDNESDAY'S HEADLINE HOOSHE: ***WINNER(S)***
A father and his two sons landed behind bars on drunken driving charges in connection to a single car accident in Vermont over the weekend. Nicholas Woodward, 19, his 22-year-old brother, Joshua, and their father, 46-year-old Brian Woodward, all from Fairfax, were arrested Saturday in Fletcher on their way home from a fishing trip. For the youngest of the Woodward trio, the arrest marked the second DUI incident in as many weeks. His older brother, Joshua Woodward, is also facing a count of driving on a suspended license. According to police in Vermont, it all started just before 8pm Saturday when a warden with the Vermont Fish and Wildlife came upon an overturned vehicle on Cambridge Road. Officers who arrived on the scene determined that Joshua Woodward was behind the wheel at the time of the rollover, and that his blood alcohol level was nearly three times the state’s legal limit. As the 22-year-old was being evaluated by paramedics on the scene, police said his 19-year-old brother, Nicholas, pulled over at the site of the wreck in his own vehicle to check up on his sibling. Brian Woodward, who was a passenger in Nicholas' truck, then got behind the wheel to move the vehicle closer to Joshua's wreckage The Fish and Wildlife game warden, who was still at the scene, noticed that Brian Woodward appeared inebriated and ordered him to stop the truck and get out, according to police. State troopers noted that the 46-year-old man reeked of alcohol and appeared impaired. A breath test confirmed that Mr Woodward also had a blood alcohol level three times the legal limit. While the father of two was being handcuffed, troopers noticed that Nicholas Woodward, who is underage, also appeared to have been drinking alcohol that night. Field sobriety tests and the teen’s preliminary breath sample confirmed that he was driving under the influence, police said.
THURSDAY'S HEADLINE HOOSHE:
MAN ROBS DRUGSTORE FOR PAIN PILLS....TWICE
Johnny Early Couch, of Lakeland, didn't stray far from his hometown to rob the same pharmacist in the same drug store wearing the same boonie hat -- twice -- while driving a black convertible Porsche, deputies said, reports The Ledger in Lakeland.. Deputies learned only a handful of black convertible Porsches are registered locally and one belonged to Couch, the report states. Cool hat though. He said he robbed the store again because the pills he had stolen before "just aint strong enough."