BY QUINTIN REED
ENG 3150

In the past eight months, Deb Peterson has mentioned McGraw Milhaven in her column ten times.  However, she has never mentioned Thom West or his partner Jeff Burton, despite the many emails and press releases that they have sent to her in hopes of getting just a snippet about them or their show.  Now back together on “the Point” after a number of years apart, their efforts to see their names in print are no longer in vain.  Deb Peterson wouldn’t give them five words, so I decided to give them over a thousand.

Thom West hopes to be dead by five o’clock today.  Not really, but he is not making it a secret that he is in a less than chipper mood on this dreary March Monday.  The short, bald, stocky, goateed radio veteran is slumped over the control board perusing the internet prior to kicking off the Monday edition of 105.7 The Point’s Thom and Jeff Show. After a long weekend that included a late Friday appearance at a local bar and his brother’s wedding, it is quite evident that he has what show producer Johnny Lomax is referring to as “a case of the Mondays.”  However, it is 2 P.M. and he has a show to do.   Despite not being in a great mood today, once it is time for him to go on the air, his cloudy demeanor temporarily escapes him as he says his usual opening line: “Broadcasting live from the mother ship, The Powerhouse at Union Station inside studio 1C, holding at one affiliate strong, this is the Thom and Jeff show.”

The show’s opening break is short.  It basically serves as a preview of what West and Burton plan to discuss over the next four hours.  Today, hot button topics include a story about a sex tape involving a monkey named Darwin, a phone call from former Blues player Kelly Chase, the daily “Celebrity Wrap up (formerly the Celebrity Crapper), “team coverage of  March Music Mayhem” and of course Thom’s mood.  It is evident why West quipped about wanting to be dead by five o’clock after Lomax and Burton informed the entire listening audience of his ho hum demeanor.  It is not just his co-workers that know he is in an off mood, but the entire listening audience.  Such information is bound to generate emails, text messages, and phone calls lovingly (or not) ostracizing Thom’s case of the Mondays. 

This is not shock radio, nor is it some sort of morning zoo fodder.  Instead, it is as Burton describes it, “two guys sitting down B.S.ing.”  West simply nods in agreement at Burton’s rather concise description.  For West and Burton, there is no blatant attempt at being controversial or edgy.  Their banter is similar to what one might hear between two friends unwinding at a bar while enjoying a few post-work beers, just with plenty of comedic audio clips.  They often refer to themselves on-air as “your radio buddies,” which as a few listeners have learned today is not too far from the truth.  Simple calls to the request line have both West and Burton scouring the internet to find out anything from why northbound I-270 is jammed to when and how one will be able to acquire tickets to this year’s free Ozzfest.  Between most music and commercial breaks, West spends his time fielding requests, answering questions, and sometimes just shooting the breeze for a second.
 
During one commercial break, Burton leaves the room while West attempts to execute a prank phone call on a Little Rock, Arkansas flower shop.  His prank calls are one of the most popular and most requested parts of the show even though most of them were recorded years ago during his stint on the Point’s now defunct morning show.  For the first time today, he looks completely energized and more importantly, alive.  In fact he is standing up, leaning into the microphone and making flamboyant hand gestures as he chats up the older woman on the other end of the phone.  The mischievous look on his face oddly matches the lispy tone in his voice.  For this call, West has taken on the persona of Lance, an effeminate man in need of flowers for his crush.  The punch line of this call comes with West attempting to get the old woman to read the short poem he has prepared for the card.  His goal is to get the lady to read back the poem without editing the expletive that he snuck in.  As the kind woman starts reading, West is starting to turn red and now having trouble holding in his laughter.  Without hesitation, the woman skips over the one thing he wants her to say as West quickly hangs up, since he can no longer contain his laughter.  “I haven’t tried one of those in over a year” referring to the prank phone call.

There is no set tone for the Thom and Jeff Show, which is part of its appeal to the listeners.  Despite the show starting off with the satirical and irreverent look at the world of tabloid journalism known as the Celebrity Wrap Up, things take a turn during the four o’clock hour.  West stoically begins to talk about a casual conversation he had with an acquaintance over the weekend concerning the number of dollars from every car that GM sells that goes towards worker benefits.  He states that he does not really have an opinion on this, but thought that it was an interesting sort of “who knew” type of fact.  Even though most people wouldn’t expect such a topic to come up on an FM alternative rock station during afternoon drive time, phone calls, emails, and text messages start pouring in with listeners’ input and opinions on the matter.

Unlike their AM talk counterparts, they do not waste time giving their audience the more than clichéd fifteen past the hour traffic and weather; however they will announce speed traps and traffic jams that their listeners report.  This approach to the drive time traffic report is somewhat ironic since they often poke fun at the folks on Fox 2 for their “ongoing team coverage” format.  On the Thom and Jeff show, the listeners are part of the team doing the covering.  If Thom and Jeff are two guys sitting around B.S.ing, then the listeners are their friends and neighbors that occasionally drop in to either say hi or raise hell.
   
While the target audience is late-teen to twenty-something, the Point’s format is broad enough to include those in middle age, i.e., my parents, to pre-teen, my siblings.  The duo acknowledges that sometimes their material is probably inappropriate for pre-teens or may alienate older demographic groups, such as discussions about pornographic web-sites or celebrities indecent exposure or behavior, but they explain that their purpose is to have fun with the subjects that they find most interesting, and if the subject is offensive to some of the listener base, then so be it.  The “show-sheet” is a one-page Word document that serves as an outline for the day’s show, but the listeners who call in are afforded a wide berth for their opinions and often this provides the best impetus for a good show.

“We try to leave the heavy politics to the show down the hall,” Burton states as he gestures about the talk format station located in the same building.  “We report the news, weather, traffic, and all that, but we do it on our schedule and in our own way; we try to read copy as little as possible”; Burton states that if you need “traffic and weather together every 10 minutes”, then you had better tune to AM 1120 (KMOX).   However, the duo does seem to be argumentative, but Thom states that this dynamic tends to be his “fault”; “Well, let’s just say that I try to get under Jeff’s skin as much as I do the listener…that’s who I am, I like to stir the pot; likewise, Jeff knows how to push my buttons.”

As the day rolls on Thom’s demeanor lightens and as the shift gets closer to ending he and Jeff are ad-libbling at will and making each other (and me) laugh out loud. 
 The dynamic of their show is continued between “on-air” segments, but the interaction involves more expletives and personal commentary.  Lomax states that he has no control over the dialogue when promos are recorded, and he often has to piece together snippets of dialogue from previous shows to complete the promo.  All Lomax has to do is give them the “bulleted points” that they add their own personalities to.  By their posture and mood, it is obvious that this is something that both men have done countless times during their careers.  The between plug banter is essentially their way of keeping themselves energized, so that they can deliver the most sonically appealing product possible.
 
As six o’clock rolls around, Thom West is still alive with enough time “to throw it over” (the desk) to Burton for one last look at the March Music Mayhem bracket.  As any regular listener knows, the show is not over until Producer Johnny comes in for the post-show meeting.  Lomax uses his airtime to let the two know of anything that they may have botched during the show as well as what he personally liked.  Other times, he comes in to say that he did not even listen.  Today, he highlights the fact that he got them a Brett Hull interview today, at which time Burton reminds him that “No, you didn’t get us Kelly Chase.”  With one more pot shot at Thom’s mood, Johnny gives them a grade of D- for the day.  As always West thanks the listeners “for coming over” and tells them that they’ll do this again tomorrow; big hugs.”